Can’t we forgive and not forget?

You didn’t wait to be introduced properly to the church community but you were part of it already. I wondered if you know that they do have marriage counselling, to avoid surprises after you married into their community. I also wonder if you knew that as per church’s rules and regulations you do not DIVORCE. It’s unheard of.

Let bygones be bygones,he has passed on just do the right thing culturally. Just go bury him please.

You might be still angry, disappointed at him that you eventually parted ways but then again I said it please do the right thing, go mourn properly culturally and religiously so.

You had fights before and after each fight you refused to leave even if asked to do so by him. Yep we understand your marriage reached its sell by date very soon but what has happened has happened. Lets move on.

It is very sad indeed when two lovers part ways and loath each other. How come two people hate each other so much? How so? Is it an issue of not finding closure? For pete sake you do have a baby girl together, how are you going to raise her? Bitter as you? Think about other people this issue affects besides you.

All the best in all your endeavors however. Know that I still love and will support however way.


Generation of tattoos

I just visited my friends and her family was visiting there.

My friend has tattoos, so is her daughter and her mother as well.

Wait, wait the similarity does not end there all 3 are very light in complexion I mean yellow bones.

They are living together.

My friend has just bought a house, it was a week ago. We all happy she is just nearby no more in the 70 kilometres from home. She is back.

She is staying with her daughter, grandson and her mother. How nice 4 generations under one roof.

It’s a happy family very nice indeed. I really like them.

Now only 1 of my friends is left however she’s busy with her home loan soon enough she’ll be in her own house with her 2 sons. This 2015 all my friends will be housed come Christmas time. It’s gonna be a blast.

Shotgun marriages

Marriage as a marriage right? I believe it had everything to do with love right? It’s about finding one’s soul-mate after all.

Well I thought wrong it had nothing to do with all the above. It’s matter of convenience. Yep its a matter of convenience. I think we all start thinking that we are in love but alas who are we kidding. Hence there is divorce after all because all of Sunday we have arguments, irreconcilable differences etc.

Some use children to trap others in marriage.

Some use force to trap others in marriage.

Some use whatever they can to trap others in marriage.

How do they say it ?

You made your bed now lie in it.

Feel free to correct me.

My sister in-horror

We were just 2, my brother and I. My mother had just the two of us. They used to tease her that she is like a pigeon and she would laugh about it until she had tears. Everybody had their own bedroom and what happened in those rooms it was your own “indaba”.

My brother met this woman and he brought her home and she never left our home. She stayed with us for donkeys years until my mother forced my brother to at least pay lobola. Indeed my brother obliged by just paying deposit of the asking price. She stayed with him despite the unfinished lobola.

My brother as time went by he was no longer satisfied with her and wanted her to leave she refused saying only death will do them apart. My brother started to have kids outside of the relationship. She stayed no matter what. We asked her to leave because now my brother is no longer staying at home and we don’t know where he is. She refused.

Then a horrible thing happened my brother passed on. Her behavior was erratic. She carried on as if she owned the house now overlooking even over riding what my mother said. After the funeral her family held a meeting advising her to stay on until she also pass on. My mother again advised to take a hint and leave. She refused. She started having affairs now she wants to bring her boyfriends over the house which was culturally unacceptable as she was still mourning her husband. We asked again to leave because now she was now it was way too much for all of us in the yard. She refused to pay for rent, electricity etc. flatly refusing to contribute. We treated her as a lodger giving her 3 months notice as required by law. She ignored the warning. Indeed 3 months lapsed and we woke her up and asked her to leave with all the stuff in that room. She left however leaving her belonging. We looked the place when she returned in the night she found the place locked. She called the police on us and the police advised her that she has to move. Then she went to the Councillor who also told the same “LEAVE”. She approached social worker who was so rude however she couldn’t help her as well.

Somebody tipped us that her father sold their family home. We didn’t believe them thought that were gossiping. It’s now 3 years since my brother passed on and guess what she still refuses to leave. Out of the blue her brother’s letter from the bank arrived which confirms that their father indeed sold their home.

Mam’lady is her name

This month is mother’s month. It reminded me of my mother and her mother. Both of have passed on. In 2010-my grandmother and 2013-my mother. Both these women were/are very important to me. They played a major role in life. They help shape and build the character that I am today. They really helped me to raise my only daughter. Today I am mother and granny to most cute and naughty boy in the world.

My granny had a garden with fruit trees viz peaches, apples, lemons, strawberries, grapes etc. On a regular basis me and my cousins would take up residence there every school holidays. The reason we were sent there was there was no one to take care of us in our respective homes therefore the safest place was granny place.

He reminds me of my dearly departed cousin was very naughty indeed. My granny used to say HE DOESN’T HAVE EARS, end of story. We were there for December holidays and it is between spring and summer, trees bloom, some of them bore some fruits already. This 1 afternoon we went after apples. Yes the looked all delicious however the were very small as they did fit in our tiny hands.

We went outside and threw our ball in the directions of the trees. My cousin went in there to take a

Am I a threat?

I fail to understand why would I be a threat to your happiness. He is yours, he has married you. Relax just be rest assured that I won’t go after him. I have this motto that I don’t eat my puke once it is out it’s gone forever never to return to my mouth or even near my mouth.

Hence I say I don’t share toys and I mean it. Don’t have time to chase after married men. I wish you all the best in your endeavor.

After all this years you still harbor resentment. Wow you’ve got some energy let alone a nerve. The fact he touches alone makes me want nothing to do with him. I won’t allow him to touch me again cos I would wonder if he compares us, that’s how he touches you too.

I love and respect myself, I won’t put myself through that. So don’t feel threatened by me.

Know this ” I don’t give a hoot that he still cares about me “, I want nothing to do with him. I despise him, his sight makes me sick. That’s how I feel with hence you’ll never see me talk to him or run after him.

My sister the black widow – 2

I keep on wondering whether my older sister is the only black widow in the family? I doubt if she is the only one. It seems like there is quite a number of them in the family.

I think my father’s so called wife is also a black widow. She has been living with my father claiming that she’s his wife and yet she couldn’t give proof of her marriage to anyone. She does not have a marriage certificate at least. She took my father’s last name after he passed just so she can be elected as the executor of his estate, which didn’t work either. He died interstate and his estate is still not wounded up till today. Her last name is not the same as my father.

She has the audacity of badmouthing everybody even her own sister. I wonder why she is doing that? What is it that she is hiding? Her own skeletons perhaps? I would be embarrassed to admit that she only went into the marriage knowing that my father was a philanderer. Wow what a bold statement from her. Where is her pride then as a woman? She says my father had affairs all over the show yet she stayed in that sham she called a marriage.

She was my father’s 1st wife sister and she used to stay with them as a young girl. Did she jump into her sister’s bed immediately her sister was no more? Was she perhaps sharing my father with her sister? Was she ever jealous of her sister’s life? Did she want my father all to herself that she killed her sister for him? If so why did she treat my siblings so bad? Why did she fight for my father’s house and yet she can’t pay for rates and taxes of that property? Why does she have to lie and badmouth everybody around her? She lies about almost everything. Why???? Did she go into the marriage thinking that she will benefit?